Conflict is part of life. Whether it’s a disagreement with your child, a tense moment at work, or a misunderstanding with a neighbor, it’s easy to get pulled into reactions that leave you drained, ashamed, or unheard. The REL Triangle is a simple tool from the REL Way guidebooks that helps you respond; not react. It gives you a structure to think clearly, act ethically, and stay true to yourself, even when emotions run high.

What Is the REL Triangle?

Imagine a triangle with three sides:

• Clarity: What’s really going on here?

• Courage: What truth needs to be faced?

• Compassion: How can I respond in a way that honors both sides?

When you’re in conflict, walk yourself through each side of the triangle. It takes less than five minutes, and it can change everything.

REL in REAL Life: A Story from Mumbai

Arjun is a 35-year-old taxi driver in Mumbai. One evening, a passenger accused him of overcharging and began shouting in the street. Arjun felt humiliated. His first impulse was to shout back and defend himself.

But he paused. He’d been reading the REL Way guidebooks and remembered the triangle.

1. Clarity

He asked himself: What’s really happening?

The passenger was frustrated, possibly confused by the fare system. Arjun realized the man wasn’t attacking him, he was reacting to a system he didn’t understand.

2. Courage

Next, Arjun considered: What truth needs to be faced?

He admitted the fare wasn’t clearly explained. He hadn’t done anything wrong, but he hadn’t made it easy to understand either.

3. Compassion

Finally, he asked: How can I respond in a way that honors both of us?

Instead of arguing, Arjun calmly showed the fare breakdown on his phone and offered to reduce the fare slightly as a gesture of goodwill.

The Outcome

The passenger calmed down. He apologized. Arjun didn’t lose his dignity, or his temper. He walked away feeling proud, not powerless.

That’s the REL Triangle in action. It doesn’t erase conflict. It transforms it.

Try It Today

Next time you feel tension rising, pause and ask:

• What’s really going on?

• What truth needs to be faced?

• How can I respond with compassion?

You don’t need to win the argument. You just need to lead through it.

Explore more tools like this in the REL Way guidebook series; available now on Amazon.